Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Crime wave.....


  We have a local, community newspaper that is free for the taking in various town stores. Now, remember, I live in a rural Maine community, within driving distance of a good size city.
   This tabloid has a Police Blotter section....keeps us abreast of all the criminal activity besmirching our neighborhood.
   Here are some examples....all true, word for word.

1. Someone reported that their child was at the library and one of their child's friends set his hair on fire.         (I'm not sure 'who's' hair actually was ablaze???)

2. Someone wanted to speak to an officer regarding the Do Not Enter sign and their customers entering the wrong way. 

3. Someone called to report that they had locked their drunken spouse in their vehicle.
(ummm...if you're INSIDE the car, can't you get out by unlocking the door??) 

4. Someone reported strange cars going down their dead end road in the middle of the night and not coming back out.      (Must be quite a collection of autos in there somewhere !)

5. Someone reported that a subject, who lives across the street from the cemetery, allows their dog to go into the cemetery each morning to do his 'business'.

6. Someone reported an abandoned motor vehicle. Subject was parked there as they had cell reception and were waiting for a phone call.

7. A caller reported a car idling at a local business. The car belonged to the owner of the business.

AND THE PIECE DE RESISTANCE ........

8. A 17 year old male was found in an elementary school flushing all the toilets !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lock your doors, pull your shades and carry mace. It's a crime laden community. 



10 comments:

TheWritersPorch said...

Too Funny Elenka! Have you ever read the 1942 book " We Took To The Woods" by Louise Dickenson Rich? It's a wonderful read about a family moving to the woods in Maine!
Carol

Piecefulafternoon said...

Oh small towns - aren't they wonderful??!!

OhioMom said...

We have a local paper with a police blotter, most of the crimes here involve shop lifting, breaking into cars and stealing computers, cell phones etc (who leaves these things in their cars in plain view?) .. and because of the high foreclosure rate, stealing copper pipe from abandoned/empty homes has come to my hood (I live in a semi-urban/inner-ring suburb of Cleveland) .. also people entering homes through unlocked doors (why would you leave home and leave your door unlocked?)

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Oh those are just priceless!

Hee hee, proceed with caution in your gang bangin' hood!

Pink Feather Paradise said...

I love those "crimes" can I swap our crimes for yours... when I lived in town (which is only 5,000 people)I caught a lad legging it out my kitchen window in the middle of the afternoon and Mr P, a friend and myself were in the lounge... luckily the dog went balistic and said thief scarpered.... we are told to lock windows and doors while you are in your house... and even in your home they tell you to not leave car keys hung up in view through windows... and to hide your pocessions so that someone looking through the window can't see what nice goodies you have.... I considered one way mirrored windows... but I moved to a village instead where crime isn't as bad!

The uk is not a fun place to live... our police are not permitted to upset or intimidate the criminal... otherwise they might sue them!

the world has gone mad!

X Alex

by the way I have an award on my blog for you if you would like it... x

BumbleVee said...

we should all be so lucky to live in your community...! lol.....

Balisha said...

I searched for chocolate post...Chocolate in the Herb Garden...Jan.29, 2009. If you can't find it...I could copy and email it to you.
Balisha

mary evelyn said...

hahaha, i love those. i love reading the college campus safety reports too. lots of good drunken student stories :o)

Debbie said...

My goodness. How do you ever sleep at night with all that crime?

jojo said...

wow, can't top that! Too Funny..;p