New painting....

After one week of school vacation, I have a painting of Monument Square in Portland, Maine.

It's not too big, about 17" x 11". Tempera Paint.

Getting high......

Last night, our local news decided to show videos of runway models falling down. Apparently a slow news night, the co-anchors got quite a kick out of watching these waifs tumble to the ground. Considering most of them don't weigh enough for gravity to kick in, I suppose this really was a news worthy event. 

Here is a video showing what they were so amused about....

With my sharp eye, I noticed that some of the issues were with the chosen footwear.

For example:

The Guinness Book of World Records documents the weirdos/ weirdo things of this world.  It's not so easy to get a slot in that book. These high, high, high heels have made the cut.

My niece is a dancer, sometimes performs ballet. I suppose these would be her formalwear.

These are kinda cute.

These would be excellent for camping. That's about the only time I find I don't have access to a bottle opener. I never remember to pack it. (toilet paper-check. bug spray-check. bottle opener-oops!) (Oh wait, I have my heels on!)

Come to think of it, these might come in handy for camping as well! Never know when varmints will raid your cooler.

Usually when you see a photo of a baby, the response is, "awwww".  I saw this photo, and I'm sorry to say, I said, "ewwwww".

Ummm.....well.....ah.......love his man-bag.

The reason I chose this topic was because yesterday I experienced an almost disastrous fall because of my footwear and if it wasn't for a wall, I would have fallen right over. The culprit?

These......

Don't even ask.......

My first cookbook....

When I was in the 7th grade a hundred years ago, my mom bought me this cookbook from the TAB book club in my Junior High. (No 'Middle School' jargon, we were the Junior HIGH!)

I still use some of the recipes to this day. 

The recipes were great, but my favorite things were the photographs and the illustrations. I had the children illustrated in the book memorized and they came to life for me upon perusing the pages hundreds of times. 

One of my favorite is the recipe for Apple Crisp. Since an apple a day keeps the doctor away, this is a wise choice for today's health conscious population. (Disregard the butter...)

I should have taken a photo of this luscious concoction in a bowl with coffee ice cream, which is the way we served it, but it's hard to take a photo at the moment when you are shoveling this into your mouth.

Note: I add raisins to the apples and walnuts to the topping....I like a good crunch.

Happy Valentine's Day.....

The best of Valentine's Day to all the lovers out there. 
Roses from my Birdman. I love you.

Its a Mall world after all........

Nude Descending a Staircase -  Marcel Duchamp

A type of walking.....

Walking. How we manage to move and keep balanced on only two feet is unexplicable to me. I have been making various types of 3-D ‘art’ in my life and I know how hard it is to get something that only has 2 ‘feet’ or ‘legs’ to stand up. It has to have perfect balance. And I mean, perfect balance.

I do not have perfect balance, but I do manage not to fall over 99.8 percent of the time. (the other .2 percent of the time is none of your business.)

So Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, recovering from open heart surgery, needs to walk. Walking is good for his heart. It’s good for lots of stuff, but there are only so many times he can walk from one end of the house and back again to get a good workout.

So off to the Maine Mall we go. To walk. Before hours. They actually open at 6:00 am for walkers!

He still is having a bit of trouble with fluid in his innards and sometimes he experiences what appears to be hyperventilation because of that. (He’s on some new meds for that...hopefully he won’t have to experience possible deflation again by having a hole punched into him with the biggest needle ever made.) Walking from the car in the subfreezing temps to the mall caused a little episode of this, but he quickly recovered.

“Are you OK?” (A question I have asked him about every 5 minutes since the surgery. Heck, I asked that question every 5 minutes even before the surgery.)

“Yeah, I’m fine” said Mr. DEDS as he was sitting on the curb trying to breathe. “Let’s go.”

So in we go. None of the stores are open yet so I don’t even recognize the place. Who knew the Mall had halls!

I read somewhere that if you walk around the perimeter of the mall, into every nook and cranny, it’s about a mile.

So here we go, walking at a pretty good pace, into every nook and cranny. ) (OK, so maybe we missed a cranny or two...)

All the way around....non-stop. Us and a bunch of other athletes doing the same thing.

When we got back to our starting point we sat down on a couch to rest. I had picked up a local community newspaper along the way and started reading a story. I barely got through one paragraph when he said, 

“OK. Let’s go.”

“OK”, I replied, ready to put on my mittens and bundle up my scarf.

“No. Let’s do it again.”

“What?”, I gasped.

“Let’s do it again.”

So off we went and did it again. Two miles (ish).

Not bad for our first marathon, doncha think?

Two new little paintings.....

Both of these are from photos Mr. Downeastdoingstuff took and was kind enough to let me use.

This is only 4 1/2"x7". (tempera)

This is an 8"x10". (tempera)

They're OK.....

That'll be Seventy Five dollars, please....

So on Monday morning, I open the fridge to get out my cottage cheese and notice that it is rather balmy in there.

I examine the icetray in the freezer and see that global warming has finally hit my icebox.

My refrigerator is silent.

It has died.

I am panic stricken because I now have a fridge full of perfectly good food that I have to do something with. I realize that I have very little time left to make breakfast, get dressed, pack my lunch, check blogs and head off to school. 

Fortunately we have an unheated summer porch right off of the kitchen, so I empty out every dang piece of food and jars of condiments (many) and heave them it out onto the porch.

(What's the shelf life of fish sauce ? ) (Several years, I hope.) (What IS fish sauce?)

I inform Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, who is still recuperating in bed at the moment, that: 

"The refrigerator is dead."

"What????" (I think he only heard the word 'dead'.)

"The fridge has died. I put all the food out onto the porch. Call the repairman. I have to go."

"OK" +  "(unheard comment under his breath)"

Text message later in the day informs me that soonest the repairman can come would be on Wednesday....... two days later!! 

So the temperature on the porch is cold enough for most food, too cold for veggies and not cold enough for ice cream and ice cream sandwiches. But it'll have to do.

Wednesday, the repair man arrives.

He opens up the bottom freezer, turns a knob (that I have never laid eyes on, even while cleaning it), and the dagnabbit thing starts up.

$75 please.

Apparently cramming an ice cream container into an already jam-packed freezer may or may not turn  off the entire refrigerator . Beware.

Going out to breakfast !!!!

It's 10 degrees out and Mr. DEDS wants to attempt to go out to breakfast somewhere! And to take pics for his blog!

Update on how we do when we get back....

(gulp)

UPDATE:

OK.....we're back.

Upon leaving the house, Mr. Downeastdoingstuff says, "Let's see how the lake looks first." (That was his first thought.)

So, off we go to Sebago Lake. Sebago Lake has a nice boat launch that is used in the winter for the ice fishermen. (ICE FISHERMEN n. 1. A lifeform, from unknown origin, that has lost its mind and labors under the illusion that fishing, especially  when it's 10 degrees outside, is fun.)

Now, Mr. DEDS hasn't been out very much since his heart repair and need to be careful. He still has some anxiety/hyperventilation issues that he needs to conquer. So, cognizant of this, I pull the car up to the ice as close as physically possible so that he could just open the door, step outside, and take a shot.

Yes?

NO!!

Off he goes......slow but steady.....out toward the ice. Just a little at first, and then a little more.

Next thing I know he's ON the glassy ice in his Sperry Rand topsider boat shoes, shuffling along.

And he keeps going....

Meanwhile, I'm in the car freaking out. I've seen him lose his breath just opening a bag of prunes. (That's another story...) As recent as last night!

I unbuckle my seatbelt just in case I need to make a dash for him. My hand is on the door handle ala Meryl Streep in Bridges of Madison County in a white knuckled grip.

I have issues with lake ice under normal conditions. I do not believe that it can hold a lot of weight. I KNOW that if I, Elenka, ever step out onto a frozen body of water, EVEN if there are trucks, snowmobiles, ice shacks, overweight fishermen and elephants on it, the additional weight that my body would put on the ice would be the straw that breaks the camel's back. So I don't even try.

But there goes my delicate, newly repaired husband, getting smaller and smaller in the grey distance.

I just about called the psychiatric version of 911.......for myself. I was that freaked out.

Would YOU walk out onto this......EVER??? Even in perfect health?  Not me.

Oh yeah, we did go out for breakfast, to the Front Room. It was very nice.

Then after that, I chauffeured him around town, down obscure streets along the docks, dodging wharf cats and high tide puddles. All for the cause of his blog. 

Another adventure under our belts.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET LITTLE SISTER......

He's drained....

"Mr. Doingstuff, we couldn't find the really big, gargantuan needle, so we're going to have to use this one. We'll just do it a couple of times."

Mr. Downeastdoingstuff is now one Liter lighter.

1 Liter = 1.05668821  Quarts (US)

That's how much fluid was sucked out of dear hubby's chest cavity.

1 Liter of stuff pressing against his delicate, pink little lung.

No wonder he couldn't breathe!!

Now he's probably going to start talking foolish again. 

We can't have everything.

OUCH !

It's three weeks today since Mr. Downeastdoingstuff's surgery. He's doing pretty well. There's just a concern with him being able to breathe. Now, I'm no nurse (well documented), but even without medical training,  I know that one should be able to breathe. I think it's a right or something. His issue is that he never knows, when he gets up from a sitting position, how far he will get without doubling over to catch his breath. Sometimes he's fine. Sometimes he's not. He would never know when the issue would arise.

It became quite annoying, to say the least, and rather inconvenient. 

Another glitch that came up was he developed a condition called Thrush. In his mouth. It may have been from all the plumbing that was in his mouth after the surgery. I assumed they would disinfect those things, but maybe not. The economy is bad everywhere.

So, for those of you that don't know, Thrush is when everything in your mouth and throat is bright red (sometimes white) and feels like someone ran coarse sandpaper all over the inside of your mouth for about 20 minutes with an orbital sander. It makes it rather difficult to eat, even the magic medicine (at least for me) Ice Cream.

So, Mr. DEDS was losing weight everyday. Some of that weight loss was welcome, although he was rather svelte before, in my eyes, but I wouldn't think, health-wise, that this was the right time for a diet. 

So another new medicine was administered and that problem is improving. I am just drinking my wine to make sure I am in good shape to dish out the ice cream when he's ready.

So, back to the breathing stuff. It appears he has fluid in one of his lungs. It is not his heart.

We had our first appointment with the surgeon yesterday and he diagnosed this current ailment.  He said his heart sounded terrific, his low blood pressure is the way it's supposed to be right now and the weight loss is good. But the fluid has to go.

How?

Tomorrow the doctor is going to take an enormous, gigantic, gargantuan needle and poke it in between a couple of ribs and suck the offending liquid out. No prob.

Of course, this was the same doctor that thought the heart surgery itself was no prob.

We all have our things, I guess.

And thank God for that.

                                                        Really big needle.

New painting....

Last July, Susan, on her blog, posted a picture of this scene she took in an area near her home in Nova Scotia. (Lucky Susan, no?) I loved the photograph so much, I asked her permission to paint it.....and she said YES. Took me a while to get started, but now, finally, it's done.

(I did move the ship/boat a little for composition purposes.) The paint used is tempera and the size is 29" x 21". I really loved working on it. 

(You can click on it to enlarge it.)

Thanks so much Susan!!!!!!!!

Note: Mr. Downeastdoingstuff photographed it for me. He is improving baby steps at a time. Seems to find it hard to fill his day, now that I, his major source of pathetic entertainment, am back at work. It's very hard to do anything. His mind wants to do things that his body is not ready to do. But he'll get there, right Don??

My top Eleven list....

Top eleven things to know if you suck as a nurse but are relegated to be a nurse anyway, kicking and screaming:

#11. Do not leave the hospital until you twice interrogate every single doctor, nurse and candystripper you see  about what you should do with the heart patient at home.

#10. Have stuff ready for the heart patient to do, ie. laptop, books, magazines, camera,

tissues, spirometer and TV, so he doesn't bug you all day. (because he WILL!)

#9. Get a Netflix subscription. (In this case a gift from a dear friend!) Put 400 movies into the movie queue.

#8. Drink wine.

#7. Put all pills into a teeny-weeny, small plastic cup before administering to the heart patient, so they all get swallowed. (This doesn't explain the pink pill that was found on the couch today.)

#6. Tell heart patient you are going to the Post Office (in our case) to get all his new get well cards because you know how good it makes him feel to open them. (**Mostly it gets you out of the house so you don't have to listen to all the weird grunts and groans for a while....)

#5. Move out of your own pillow top bed with the heated mattress pad for the foreseeable future and onto the couch in the next room. Plan on it. Live with it.

#4. Keep a detailed  chart of when all the medicines were given. (Take a few yourself.)

#3. Drink wine.

#2. Plan to get right up again every single time you sit down to get, move, find or throw out something.

#1. Two tablets of Senecol followed by 10 dried prunes in the morning make for an interesting day.

First outing....Walmart! (parking lot)

There are many souvenirs of our adventure last week. This handy-dandy drinking cup from the hospital, which was invaluable when he was there. It's losing it's novelty here at home, but we have other cups....

The flowers behind the cup settling in next to the Christmas Poinsettia.

Many cards and food from family and friends.

THIS ring was around my neck. If Mr. Downeastdoingstuff couldn't wear it, (for the first time since we were married) then I was going to wear it. And I did. Along with the heart locket he gave me a long time ago. (which houses a photo of my son when he was little, and it used to have a picture of Mr. Downeastdoingstuff at one time, but he fell out....)

Today he got to put it back on. So now when he hugs the heart pillow the hospital gave him to use when coughing or sneezing, the ring is in its rightful place. Amen.

He's home!!!!!!!!!!!!

Home sweet home, that's for sure. That's for darn sure!

My sweetie is home. I arrived at the hospital this morning to participate in a 'class' for patients and family on "Going Home...". A sweet, sweet nurse outlined the details of what life at home will, should, might be like. There were 2 other patients there, all men, one other guy with his wife. One man appeared to be half asleep during the informal presentation and the other guy was moving furniture around and hopping around like a bunny. (He was promptly told to cool it...)

There was still a chance he might not go home, as we were waiting for the results of a blood test to see how well his blood was thinning. The results came back just under the wire for going home-ability, and he got the OK!

He really didn't eat or sleep well in the hospital, or as they say in England, didn't sleep well in hospital, but on the way home he made me stop at a local deli and get an 'Italian' (New England) sandwich and a large container of beef stew, which he promptly devoured! We started watching Julie and Julia, upon which he fell asleep in the recliner. He slept for about 2 hours and now is reading his e-mails on his laptop!!

Here's hoping for a strong and uneventful recovery, because, as I told you before...I 'suck' as a nurse!

Happy Day !!

Fifth Day.....

Pretty good day. He's getting bored, but he's also tired. He isn't getting much sleep ..... it's a pretty noisy place and they keep coming in and out of the room. He's eating a little, but not great. It's very tough to cough. He's been walking around as he can now, with the aid of a walker, get up and walk himself down the halls and to the room where the computers are. He even left a comment on his own blog today! (Good job, Birdman!)

He still might be coming home tomorrow, but we still don't have the final OK. His sugar levels are still a little too high. 

My son and I went in to visit this afternoon and before I knew it, after our walk, #1 son laid on the bed and promptly fell asleep and Mr. Downeastdoingstuff fell asleep in the lounge chair and there I was, staring at the both of them sleeping. The nurses thought it was quite humorous. I read the paper, did a crossword puzzle and went and got an ice cream in the family kitchen. I almost fell asleep as well! We're an exciting bunch.

Hopefully I'll be tellling you all next that he's home. Although I don't want him home if he's not ready. I, myself, am not ready for that!

Thanks for all of your comments of support. It means a lot to me.

Fourth Day....

Today at around 3 it was exactly four days since the operation. We were told that this would be a roller coaster ride, and so far it has been.

Today Mr. Downeastdoingstuff experienced what they think was like a panic attack. He had just finished eating supper and felt bloated and warm. Went into the bathroom and then he just didn't feel right. Nurse came in and his numbers were a little off, but soon came back to normal. Later a doctor came in and explained that this could happen. It needs to be mind over matter. But I still find it worrisome.

Now they say he's probably coming home on Monday. I would rather that anyway, because then, at 10:00 am we can both go to a little class on what to do and expect when going home after heart surgery. They don't offer this class on Sundays. Also, apparently, a visiting nurse will come out and evaluate what he might and might not need at home. ( Guess I need to clean the house!)

He's is also struggling with nasal congestion, something he gets even at home. The air is so dry in room at the hospital. They finally brought him a humidifier to use.

His roommate went home tonight, 2 days after a lung operation!!!! Good grief! Just a young guy.

So I'm home. It's 10 degrees out and I stopped for some groceries on the way home around 10 pm.

So......tomorrow is another day.

Third Day.....

What a change! Yesterday (Friday) was his best so far. He had the drainage tubes removed which made him much more mobile, although the process they utilized to remove them was very technical and complex:

"We're going to take these tubes out today."

"OK. Good"

"Now this is going to hurt somewhat...."

Nurse grabs a hold of the 1/2 diameter clear tube protruding out of patients stomach and using her best pull out methods, with one good yank, out it comes.

"&^$@$%*(((()(*&#@@@#$%!!!!!!!!!!!",  replies the patient.

By the time I got to visit Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, he had already taken two walks, and had managed to eat more than yesterday. He seemed much more comfortable, although we all would probably be more comfortable if we didn't have a garden hose in our guts anymore.

Just looking at the way he was sitting in the lounge chair told me so much. Much more relaxed, leg crossed or one foot up on the bed and leaning back. I could tell he was feeling much better. There is still a tube in his neck, I think it's a port because it wasn't connected to any saline bags and he is still on oxygen and still wired to the temporary pacemaker. But all in all, a much better day.

They tell him that he might be coming home on Sunday!!

Guess I have to go out and load up his birdfeeders which I just noticed are empty. I've been coming home in the dark everyday and didn't notice that. It's 20 degrees out in I'm in my PJ's. That ain't happening for a while.......

Second Day....

They told him that the second day would be one of the worst, and it was. He is being weaned off of a lot of the meds he was on, including the push button morphine doohickey. He was administered a pill for the pain that made him extremely nauseous and sweaty and his 'numbers' were thrown off. (their words, not mine)(sounds like some Las Vegas terminology)
He was feeling so poorly that he called me and asked me not to come in right after school. I was to wait a few hours so that he could rest.
I kept myself busy at school because it would have been pointless to go all the way home. So my nervous energy got a lot of work done in my classroom!!
Fortunately when I finally got up there around six, he was feeling much better.
His color is very good. They did take him out for his first walk in the morning. He managed just fine but said that his legs felt very weak, plus he has no appetite. I, myself, because somebody has to do it, had to eat his ice cream.
The nursing staff continues to be a source of wonderment.
I still keep asking him to try and stay there, oh, about 3 weeks and that I WOULD come up and visit him everyday, but he doesn't want to for some reason. Since I 'suck' as a nurse (sorry), I thought that was a great idea, but it didn't go over very well.
Seriously, I'm looking forward to Saturday. I am tired. My alarm at 5:20 am is not welcoming these days.
I am so thankful to all family and friends who have been so supportive. The support from my cyber friends, many of which I have never met, has been wonderful. Thank you.

It's over!

Heart surgery for Mr.Downeastdoingstuff aka Birdman finally happened yesterday.

Surgery was scheduled for 12:30 pm. We went into the hospital in the morning and spent time with him until around 11, when they took him to the holding area for surgery. Not knowing where to go and how to get there in this massive hospital, the driver of the bed told us to come into the elevator with him and he would drop us off at the floor where the cardiac waiting rooms are.

That was one of the hardest parts, for us. Having said goodbye and wishing him well in his room, we now found ourselves leaving the elevator with Mr. DEDS/Birdman still inside. We tried to hold it together as best as we could for him, but were overwrought with emotion as the elevator door slowly shut with us on the outside waving goodbye to the inside of the elevator. 

The operation was supposed to take 2 1/2 hours and actually took 2 3/4 hours. Not bad.

The doctor came in and told us that everything went very, very well and he was happy with the outcome. His valve did NOT have to be replaced, just repaired. That was what we were hoping for. 

After about 45 minutes more, we were able to go into the ICU and see him. We were told that he would look terrible and to be prepared, but I think it was one of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen. There he was, not really bloated, pretty good color, breathing calmly with 20 million machines, tubes, wires and pumps all making sure my guy was alright. We stayed for about 5 minutes, talked to him a little and then left. I knew he didn't know we were there, but just in case he somehow subconsciously felt our presence, we wanted to be there. This was about 4:30, I guess. I lost track of time after diligently watching the clock during the surgery.

We had planned on going back in around 9:00, just in case he would wake up, but once we got home, we both discovered just how exhausted we were and decided not to take the 40 minute drive back. I called the hospital and they told me that he was starting to wake up, they were giving him ice chips to quench his massive thirst and the breathing tube was out. That was good news.

I went to work the next day (today) and while driving in, I got a phone call. It was Birdman!!!!

I was shocked beyond words. By 2:00 am, they had put him into a chair and by 6:00 am he was moved into a regular room! AND he sounded very good. Music to my ears.

We went in around 10:00 am for a quick visit. He was up in the chair again because he is the most comfortable there. This time he sounded quite a bit more tired, but still was very, very chatty! Talked nonstop. Voice was a little hoarse from breathing tube. Said he wasn't in very much pain, although a hiccup, cough or laugh made him uncomfortable.

Went back around 3:45 and stayed until around 6. He seemed a little more uncomfortable, but still good. He was quite tired and if I wasn't there, he probably would've dozed off right in the chair. He will be walking tomorrow.

I am soooo  tired, that's it for me. Hoping everyday gets better.

It's over!

So far, so good....

Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, AKA Birdman, passed all medical tests today without studying. White blood cells still in normal level so it's on with the show!!

He rates the facilities good, the food OK, but the nurses....the nurses get an A+. Truly, they were top notch. It takes a special person to be a nurse, that's for sure.

He got moved to another room to get ready for surgery, so new nurses.

He's ready.

Here we go......

Am I ready for this?

 Hi there, Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, AKA Birdman. I just have to find my non-latex gloves, snap them on and I'm ready! (I think.......????) (Yeah, I am.) (I think.....)

Tomorrow you are registering into the hospital. You are having your heart fixed. Make sure you tell the doc to be careful, since you already have my heart. You've had it for over 34 years.

But back to reality, as I said in a comment on your blog, my dear Birdman, I've been studying Nurse Ratchet for several weeks now and I must say, she's got it all together. 

So off to the hospital you go. (Again....)

Now even further back to reality, it's been snowing for 3 days now and you are out snowblowing the driveway as I type. Two days ago you had ME try THIS THING out......
And I drove it directly into this....

No damage done, missed the electric eye of the garage opener by a good eighth of an inch, so all is well. Are you trying to tell me that you won't be able to snow blow for a while??? 

Today I have to try raking the roof. With a snow rake. What's up with that?

And you tell me  that 'I' have to actually put wood into the woodstove?? That I have to go outside to the woodshed all hours of the day, and pick up logs and bring them into the house?

I thought that happened automatically.

So, I guess I'm ready. (....help....)

Just as soon as I practice doing this....

My first anniversary !

One year ago today I was sitting on my couch and Mr. Downeastdoingstuff, also known as Birdman on his blog, said to me:

"You should do a blog."

This was from the mouth of a person that had just started his own Daily Photo blog the day before, so by now, he was a blog expert.

"What?"

"You should start a blog."

"Nah.""I don't need one more thing to do...."

"Well, you should just check it out."

So he told me where to go on the internet and by that night, I had a blog.

One year ago today.

I just want to thank all the lovely folks that have bothered to eyeball my blog and especially to the people that have written comments. It's been a lot of fun and I so enjoyed reading all of your blogs. There are so many lovely, lovely people out there. 

As Birdman and I go on our next adventure (his heart surgery on Tuesday), I know I will be given so much support via this blog. It's been a wonderful journey.

Thank you all.

Christmas Day lessons.....

Christmas day observations....

1. Preparing and precooking food as much as possible for 10 guests allows you to spend more time with these 10 wonderful people......NOT!   Someone still has to actually physically pick up the food and do something with it.

2. Planning the order of things that have to use the oven, from appetizers to main meal, takes on a different meaning when your first dish, a crusty brie en croute doused with maple syrup and brown sugar explodes in your oven....at least the glass dish exploded, coating the bottom of the oven with a gooey mess.

Note to self: A gooey mess in the bottom of the oven begins to smoke, big time, if you continue to use the oven.

(Thanks, B, for scrapping out the gunk while I hid in the other room.)

3. Salvaging a Brie en Croute onto another plate and praying that there are no glass shards embedded in the bottom, still serves as a decent appetizer that people will still actually eat!

4. People should probably be told that one of the sliced cheeses has jalenpeno peppers in it.

5. Keep the liquor flowing....less chance of noticing glass in your bite of Brie en croute.

6. Make sure that the 20 something year olds have i phones to keep themselves entertained. Contacting someone with your iphone that is sitting right next to you, apparently is quite entertaining. Comparing what apps you have and what apps you don’t have could also be the hit of the party. 

(I’m pretty cool, using the word apps, doncha think?) LOL  ROTFLMAS

7. Make sure you invite at least one guest that can keep the conversation going or stopping it dead in it’s tracks with recollections from the long ago past that involve past girlfriends, embarrassing incidents, and wild stories, like the night this guest actually sold a pair of jeans he was wearing to a member of the opposite sex.

8. Nix idea of using Mom’s china and initialed silverware that she purchased from Bambergers in the 1940’s if you don’t have a dishwasher. Invest in Chinet and plastic utensils stock tomorrow.

9. Don’t cut your finger on a knife in the morning when you have to have your hands in water all day. 

10. Second note to self: Build a large dining room on Christmas Eve. Eating on the floor is so not cool.

11. Finally, realize when you have a minute to sit back and observe, that you have the best family and friends in the world. 

As Tiny Tim so aptly put: "God bless us. Everyone one."

MERRY CHRISTMAS

I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.  ~Charles Dickens

May the New Year bring peace, happiness and health to you all.

More chipmunk action......

So I'm trying very hard to fall back asleep in the early morning, knowing that I have to get up for the day at 5:30 a.m. It's 2:00 am and once again I'm up, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed.

I've learned that when I'm in this condition there's no point in lying there, I need to get up.

So off to the kitchen I wander, bundled up in my son's XXL Mexican alpaca zip-up poncho and my L.L. Bean wool socks.

I fix myself a steaming cup of mint green tea and open up a sleeve of salt-free saltines. (An oxymoron?)

I watch 5 minutes of a movie called 'Booty Call'. It became obvious why this movie was on at 2 o'clock in the morning, so I flick channels. Discovering nothing worth watching, I check up on some blogs I enjoy and then go back to bed. Eventually I almost doze off....

Around 5 a.m. I hear muffled voices from the adjacent bathroom, but choose to ignore it. My son goes to bed at ungodly hours sometimes, so I've learned to tune-out noises coming from the house. I also have 2 cats that make weird noises and keep weird hours.

At 5:45 I shuffle into the kitchen. Mr. Downeastdoingstuff is already up and on his laptop. If you have been keeping track of his impending surgery adventure, you know he didn't go back to work after getting booted out of the hospital. But he gets up anyway, just about every morning, work or no work, when it's still dark.

"There's a critter in the house" he says.

"What? Again?"

"Yeah," he answered, "I was sitting on the toilet and a chipmunk came running in followed by both girls."

"You're kidding?"

"Nope. The darn thing ran around the toilet a couple of times chased by the cats."

(stiffle giggle) "While you were on the toilet?" I asked. (stiffle...stiffle...stiffle)

"Yeah."

"Where," I inquire, "is it now?"

"I don't know."

This isn't the first time this has happened in our 190 year old house. The house is not as air-tight as I would like it to be. 

I knew something was up the night before. When the cats park themselves in front of a large piece of furniture or major appliance and stare at it as if Mickey Mouse himself was due to pop out at any moment, I know something is lurking in the dark.

But I had to go to work, so I let the thoughts of this incident drift out of my mind.

Until last night.

I get home after a draining couple of hours at the Mall. My fuzzy gloves currently reside at the Mall as they fell out of my pocket somewhere in my travels from store to store.

"What's the critter news," I ask.

"No news. It's still here somewhere."

"Have you seen it?"

"Yeah, it's running around."

To make a long story short, around 8:30 PM I hear sounds like something is being beaten to death with a broom.  That's because something was being beaten to death by a broom.

In my bathroom. On my heated floor. On my white alabaster grout.

This is Mr. Downeastdoingstuff's story....

"This is a cautionary tale... you might NOT want to read on. All card carrying members of PETA should leave this post at this time... It might have been a Chip, might have been a Dale..., but for sure it certainly was a chipmunk. After watching its antics all day I can say this, it WAS a dancer, but  NOT a member of the Chippendales. The cats and I tracked this critter ALL day, from room to room. Cats wanted to play--- I had more sinister plans. Near the end - it jumped up about 5 feet, straight into the air and even landed for a moment, on my fleece. Scary????? It reminded me of the "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" scene when the squirrel jumped out of the tree and turned the household into turmoil. Ha! Now weaker individuals(read: 'pussies', wimps, and spleeny people w/o backbone... my mom's words) would have cowered at even the thought of taking on this 1 1/2 inch 'beast'. However, after the 'damage' was done all I could think of was-- this guy (me) stays home from work for this?"

OK, here is the evidence...if you are faint of heart, don't look. (There's no blood)

Ready?

Rest in Peace, Chip.

The murder weapon.

Case closed.....til next time.